“Can Lorenzo access you systems?”
“Can Lorenzo access your systems?”

“but I declined, Michelle knew my opinion”
Probably, “but I declined; [or :] Michelle knew my opinion”

“dark and the city if Tokyo”
“dark and the city of Tokyo”

“You know,” I told Delores and Michelle over an early, light breakfast. I wonder at who invented scones.”
“You know,” I told Delores and Michelle over an early, light breakfast, “I wonder who invented scones.”

“Where is you mobile?”
“Where is your mobile?”

“Why would Rhianna’s force be any different.”
“Why would Rhianna’s force be any different?”

Good work!

But I will still require your services as consult.”
consultants?

Does Delores always sleep that much?”

“What?” Michelle asked as she sat. She let out a long breath, apparently not used to dealing with the conversation she just had to have. Finally, she managed to get her thoughts together enough to respond. “No, no, she’s just clinically depressed. Sleeps all the time

Does she sleep a lot or not? She says no, then that she sleeps all the time.

She… Wouldn’t happen to be amazingly

W -> w ?

who else need to contact us

need -> needs